By the time children are about seven years old, most parents have begun to think, “It’s about time she did a little work around here!” and the battles begin. “When are you going to feed the dog?” “That garbage needs to be taken out right now!” “Honey, how many times do I need to ask
A child becomes afraid when circumstances beyond her control, or circumstances she doesn’t understand, rock her fragile sense of safety. The process of development, birth and early growth presents many moments when a child’s sense of safety is challenged. And although we consider ourselves an advanced society, many children still face deeply isolating and even
en français When a baby is first born, we have the delightful, delicate task of getting to know her. We learn how she sleeps, how she eats, and see how she gazes into our eyes with trust and interest. She needs nourishment, closeness, familiarity and warmth, affection, and at times she needs respite from the
I’m struck again and again by how hard each parent I know tries to do well by his child. We make great efforts, moment by moment and day by day. Once the efforts begin, we never stop caring. We never stop trying. We never stop noticing how we’re doing. And we frequently worry about how
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We often think it’s our job as parents to teach our children the concept of sharing, to time turns, or give a toy to another child to stop a tantrum. This can be an exhausting task!
“I’m bored!” What’s a parent to do when a child flops down on the floor and complains, “I’m bored! There’s nothing to do,” and waits, blank and listless, for some zap of inspiration to save them from a fate worse than chores? Our children are born to play, create, and feel great satisfaction. They want
Sooner or later in our lives as parents, we find ourselves locked in a power struggle with our child. It can happen over being fed with a spoon when a baby is just a year old. It can happen over getting dressed in the morning, over brushing teeth, and over going to bed. Our children, like
Many children go through a long phase during which they love to use body words and potty words to shock people, and to laugh and laugh. This is normal. It happens all over the world. So if your child is using potty words, fasten your seat belt for a good long journey! The better your
Q. It seems to me that children aren’t playing with each other the way they used to. Sometimes, it looks to me like they hardly play with each other at all–they act out imaginary scripts, and they’re each in their own little worlds, next to each other. What can I do to get them really playing again?
Welcome to Hand in Hand’s family of people dedicated to putting connection at the center of parenting. We’re glad you are interested in building a safe learning environment for parents, and in exploring Hand in Hand Parenting with other parents! We are confident that the guidelines set out below, together with your intelligence, good will, and common
We at Hand in Hand are working to introduce parents everywhere to one very simple new idea that changes the work of parenting. The heart of this idea is that children’s feelings play a deeply useful role in their lives. Children’s feelings arise when they haven’t yet been able to fully comprehend a challenging experience.
Special Time is a simple idea that carries a lot of power. It’s a highly dependable way to build and to rebuild a close connection with a child. Special Time is when the parent spends a well-defined amount of time one-on-one with their child, with no interruptions, promising to do whatever the child wants to
Playdates can be great adventures for our children, and be a nice break for us as parents. But it’s important to establish some policies ahead of time to ensure the children will get along. When you and your child join or set up a play group, or get together with other families, it helps to
Children function best when they feel connected to someone who cares about them. You can build connection with your child through play, laughter, roughhousing, cuddling, and warm, enthusiastic attention. Stresses of all kinds, loneliness, isolation, and criticism erase a child’s sense of connection, and make it harder for a child to love and learn. Play
Q. My 6-year-old seems to be suffering from performance anxiety and perfectionism not only at school but overall in his life. I’d love to get some ideas or help with this issue. Specifically what I notice is that my son will start on a homework activity (for example, a math word problem) and get into an
Tickling children is one of those customary kinds of play that is handed down from generation to generation through our families. It is rarely questioned, but deserves to be thought about more carefully, as it’s a form of play that can, despite good intentions, hurt a child. To put tickling in a broader framework, it’s
Un niño se atemoriza cuando circunstancias fuera de su control, o circunstancias que todavía no comprende, afectan su fragil sentido de seguridad. El proceso de desarrollarse, nacer y crecer durante los primeros años incluye muchas ocasiones en que el sentido de seguridad de un niño se ve desafiado. Aunque creamos vivir en una sociedad “avanzada”,