Someone asked me the other day why, when I’m busy with three young boys and running my own business, was I willing to take time out to write a Hand in Hand Parenting book? Honestly, the question struck me as odd, as I feel I owe both my parenting success and my ability to address my parenting struggles to Hand in Hand and to Patty Wipfler, who has been a mentor like no other. And what happens when you’re filled with so much hope and gratitude is that you want to share it.
How could I possibly settle for status quo and watch so many parents struggle when I hold in my hands these simple, yet brilliant, strategies that can help parents create a much more pleasant home front and feel good about their parenting? Some of us are blessed with “easy” kids who, with lots of love, a roof over their head, and some food seem to blossom beautifully. (That’s the rumor, anyway…) And then there are the overwhelming majority of us who have at least one child whose behaviors and struggles challenge us in ways that make us wonder who thought we were up for this parenting job in the first place!
Patty and I are working tirelessly writing a book to reach all parents, spreading the message that the expression of feelings has real value, and that tapping into those feelings using the 5 simple Hand in Hand Parenting Tools will both transform families and create a positive, revolutionary impact on the world.
We’ve all known for a long time now that hurt people hurt people. And many of us parents are hurting. We live in societies where our tireless work is perceived as boring and unimportant, and earns no respect at all. We are under-resourced, exhausted, and unappreciated. And to top it off, we all feel alone in our struggles.
Now, through both practical use of the Hand in Hand Parenting Tools and scientific research, we know that hurt people can heal. Drawing on our almost five decades of experience working with parents (of which I can only claim just shy of a decade), we have taught thousands of parents how to support one another so that they have the capacity to treat their children well and raise a generation of caring, compassionate, independent thinkers.
And when we parents feel supported and well-resourced, we can make magic happen! Only it’s not really magic. It’s work. But it’s the most important work most of us will ever contribute to the world. And when we work together, it is invigorating, inspiring, and incredibly rewarding!
Through our writing, Patty and I aim to support parents so well that none of us feel cornered and driven to hit or shame or blame our children. Instead, we parents will have lots of resource and inspiration to lead our children through their struggles. Whether the struggle is with separation, sleep, aggression, fear, school, siblings, or whatever. Before they finish our book, parents will understand simple tools to interrupt unworkable behaviors and bolster both their own self-esteem and their child’s.
Of course I chose to write this book with Patty! What an incredible honor and opportunity to create meaningful change in this hurting world. Let’s get this revolution going!
You can learn more about Tosha Schore and her parenting partnership services by visiting her website.
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