Month: December 2016

Permission to Feel Sad This Holiday Season

  Three years ago on Christmas morning, I started crying. My grandmother had died a month earlier and I was spending Christmas with my in-laws. Suddenly I felt bad as if I had abandoned my own family. My husband got upset too, I could see that he was feeling unhappy that I was suddenly wanting

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The Day I Said I Hate My Kids

By Lauren Stearns Last year when my son entered 7th grade it seemed like EVERYTHING changed. The connection that I had worked so hard to build with him using  Hand in Hand tools felt broken. I couldn’t tell if it was him or it was me, but all we seemed to do was lock horns.

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Kids Know What They Need

We know that babies cries alert parents to their needs. How else could we know when they need comfort, food, changing? But children are just as in touch with what they need to survive and feel well, even if we, as parents, might not be as alert to their calls. In this post, Brindusa Milasan

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Keeping Closer to Your Teen: Why Parents Need Flexibility

Planning Special Time with a teen can be a little different than with a younger child. It’s a topsy-turvy road of uncertainty, for sure.  Several years ago my son always jumped at the chance to have Special Time. Now that he is 13, he often tells me that he does not want it – most

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Who’s Listening To You Over the Holidays?

  Two good friends and mothers we’ll call Emma and Carol had been living 2500 miles on opposite coasts for several years now. Carol finds her middle child, Cammy, deeply challenging. During Carol’s last two months of pregnancy and first few months of Cammy’s life, their family was suddenly without a place to live—a shocking turn of

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Sarbatorile si pierderea cumpatului

Sarbatorile si pierderea cumpatului vin impreuna si se potrivesc precum untul de arahide si jeleul. Copilul tau se va confrunta cu niste sentimente puternice cand urmeaza un eveniment important, cum ar fi o zi de nastere sau o sarbatoare speciala. Este un fenomen la fel de precis ca un ceas elvetian. Noi parintii ne dorim

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Tații sunt tot părinți

Copiii își iubesc tații! Copiii voștri adoră să vă audă vocea, să vă vadă intrând pe ușă, să stea lângă voi la masă și să se joace cu voi cât mai mult posibil. Un tată îmi povestea o dată cum micuțul lui de 15 luni s-a urcat în patul lui și al soției la ora

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Teen Emotions: Helping Your Teen To Release

My daughter, 13, and I were getting ready for bed this week when things turned playful. It started because she is a master at picking up any irritation in my voice, even when I’m not aware of it. We joked with each other about the difference between how she experiences things and how I do

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How to Make Brushing Teeth Fun

My son had been avoiding brushing his teeth for a couple of days before Christmas, and then on Christmas day, he’d eaten more sugary foods than he’s usually allowed. My husband was getting concerned, and as a result I could hear him getting rather heavy handed about tooth brushing and trying to set a limit

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don't know how to play with my kids

What If I’m Just Not A Playful Parent?

“Play with me?” That one question is asked at least 100 times a day in most houses, by kids to their parents. Time and time again we hear that play improves connections. Greys Anatomy-creator (and former workaholic) Shonda Rhimes did a whole Ted Talk on how play impacted her life as a parent. Larry Cohen has two

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When Crying Just Needs to Stop

Most of us are taught to hush children when they cry, but parents using Hand in Hand’s approach learn how valuable crying can be for a child’s emotional health. When crying is supported with a parent’s warm support and attention, crying can be a unique way for children to unblock fears and uncertainties, but there

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Helping Families After ACEs Replay

Listen now for new insight into recovery after Adverse Childhood Experiences. “Where other [practices] may focus on different ways to handle the emotional experience, teaching techniques for self-regulation, Hand in Hand looks at what is happening in the environment and what happens when we provide holding for that emotional experience.” – Maya Coleman, PhD Clinical…...

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An Alternative to Shouting During Morning Upsets

I have done a lot of limit setting and Staylistening with my 5-year-old since learning Hand in Hand Parenting’s five tools, and I’ll admit that Staylistening has been a work in progress. Staylistening comes from the approach that children cry and tantrum to release feelings that are troubling them. Parents might be aware of what

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