Category: Separation

Listening Helps Calm My Grandson’s Fears

When our grandson was one, and just walking, we convinced his parents to let us babysit so they could have a night out.  They were quite nervous because they did not like to hear their son crying.  We told them we could handle it, and promised we would call if things got out of hand.

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Listening Helps When Taking Kids Grocery Shopping

Everything went well until we got to the checkout line and he asked for gum. I said no and he began to have a full blown tantrum, I was completely overwhelmed with the baby, the groceries and him. So I bought the gum. All the way home, I kept saying to myself, “You are being controlled by a child! This can only get worse.”

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Staylistening with a Six-Month-Old Twin

I have a friend who has twin girls. Ever since they were born one of the twins (the second to be born) was labeled the more difficult one. She cried more than her twin sister, she ate less, and was not very easy to please. When they were about six months old, I was visiting the family,

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When Your Child Only Wants Mommy

It was time for The Bedtime Routine. It had been decided that it was Dad’s turn for books, snuggles, and tuck-ins. When I tried to give my son a hug and pass him off to his dad in the rocking chair, he clung to me and started to fuss. I dramatically pulled him back from my husband’s arms and said playfully, “No, no, you CAN’T have my baby! He’s mine, MINE!!”

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Nighttime Farting Dissolves Tension

After a weekend together, my husband and I were putting our kids to bed.  The lights were out, but my 5-year-old was not settled; he was making a raspberry noise.  This annoyed his brother, my 9-year-old, who shouted, “Be quiet! Stop that noise!” We tried, “your brother is asking you, please stop.”  But nothing seemed

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Listening to My Sons Helps Them Share

My three-year-old and I had a Special Time during my older son’s piano lesson.  When it ended and was time to pick my older son up, my younger son asked if he could get stickers also.  His brother gets stickers at the end of a piano lesson.  I said casually, “Okay let’s go in and

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How I Helped My Son Stop Biting

Resolving the biting issue was a priority over other jobs I had, and I rationed my energy and attention to deal with his new aggression. I reduced the time I spent on my household work (I did very minimum vacuum cleaning, dish washing and cooking!) to stay close by when my sons were together so I could reach in before things escalated.

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A Mom’s Open Response To Her Child’s Aggression

My older son, who was six, had been constantly on the edge for a few weeks. He let out his feelings by crying on weekends and then go back to school on Monday.  His first grade teacher told us that he would take a long time on each school task, and sometimes couldn’t finish. I

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Daddy can care for you too!

“Just Momma!” my daughter would cry. “Momma do it!” During the toddler and early pre-school years my daughter would cling to me for dear life when all I wanted to do was take a shower in peace. While this wasn’t an every day event, it was still enough that it limited both of us and

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Turning Goodbyes Into Good Fun

My oldest son, Hunter, was having a very hard time when his father left for work in the morning.  Each morning, he screamed, fought and threatened, trying to hold on to his dad, crying and pleading with him to keep him from leaving.  At times, if I was in the other room with his younger brother,

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Special Time and Face Time

I had been having a harder and harder time carving out regular Special Time for my two sons.  During the day, when I am the only adult present, neither of them can stand to be alone while the other receives my warmth and attention.  I don’t blame them!  I tried to do Special Time in

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Special Time Helps Heal a Separation

My 3-year-old daughter had never been away from me for more than half a day, until I went to the Hand in Hand Parent Retreat this year. She stayed with her father in a hotel close by so I could spend the nights with them. But during the day I was away. My daughter did

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Helping a Toddler with Biting at Day Care

I had cared for one toddler at my day care center throughout his infancy and we had shared many good and close times together.  He began biting other toddlers a few months after he had moved into the toddler room. It took our staff a week, and a couple of conversations with his Mom, before

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Staylistening at Bedtime: Letting a Child Have Feelings About Separation

Eventually I said, “OK, you go to sleep now. Do you remember that I love you?” He said, “OK! Yes. Do you remember I love you?” I said yes, and he yawned. I sat for a few more minutes and asked him a couple of more times if he remembered that I love him. He said yes and was quiet. Less than 10 minutes later I went in to check on him as promised, and he was asleep. I kissed his cheek. He opened his eyes a bit and nodded when I asked if he remembered I loved him. And then he went back to sleep.

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A Game to Help Children with Shyness in Groups

Hi Patty, Group settings, especially large group settings, are very difficult for my daughter. I see a little girl who has some real fears of these situations, and it really hurts to see others judging because she is nervous and only wants to stay in my arms. She will often display behaviors like nose picking

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Wanting Mama

My daughter is 3, and she’s going to pre-school now. My husband and I have recently separated. Ella loves school. She talks about it enthusiastically when she’s at home, and she likes being there, but has a very difficult time when I leave her there. She wraps herself around me, clings tightly, and won’t let

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