Listening Partnerships

 

On Listening Partnerships

When two parents exchange listening time, taking turns to talk uninterrupted and without offering advice, it can make a world of difference for each parent. This time becomes a place to share our victories and struggles and a place to mourn our losses and set new goals.

Here’s what one mom and Hand in Hand Instructor noticed about how in-person and distance listening times differed for her.

When I have in-person listening time sessions they are usually preceded by some shopping and maybe a nice lunch on my “half-a-day-off”. By the time I get to my listening time, I am a million miles away from family life and typically use the listening time to work on feelings around non-family issues.

I have found it is a great benefit to have a phone listening time right after the children have gone to sleep. This is the worst time of my “bad days” when I am exhausted, tight and furious.

When my listening partner called, I would already be in my re-stimulated state and ready to work on how much I hated being a mom sometimes and how I felt like my life was being stolen from me! I would also be more able to access feelings about my marriage which had been rocky until December of 2008.

During this time, I would cry deeply. Afterward I felt much more relaxed and much more loving toward my children. I was full of energy and ideas on how to restructure my everyday life to have the energy needed for being a mom.

Now, the times I get so frustrated have dramatically decreased. It is interesting that the pros of having somebody listen in-person can sometimes be outweighed by the pros of having someone listen from a distance during a time when one is right in the midst of an emotional episode.

Read up on how this mom used emergency listening to help her marriage.

10 thoughts on “Listening Partnerships

  1. Pingback: Setting Limits Uncovered School Time Hurt

  2. HI I live in Canada Ontario and looking for a listing partner. I have a 2yrd and 7 months son. You can email me or conact me by phone my cell phone and is 6474008805 if u r interested.

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  4. Pingback: Giggle Parenting For A ‘Chatterbox’ Reader Question N.O 6 | Listening to Tears

  5. Pingback: Webinar: 10 Tips To Reduce Arguing with your Partner About Parenting | Birth and Parenting

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