This is What It Sounds Like When Moms Cry

from the hand in hand blog(1)

 

Mom needs to cryIt was Friday, the last working day in a long week and frustrating things just kept happening. Some were to do with my family – like my son refusing to do his homework and some were to do with me – like not being able to publish my articles sooner.

The need to cry and release all these tensions was evident, but I just could not cry. And, in the meantime, I felt drained of all power, unable to enjoy my three kids or play with them.

I felt sick to my stomach, tired and edgy.

In Need of a Listening Partner

I called my Listening Partner, but she couldn’t answer her phone so I decided to take matters into my own hands. I went into my room and started shaking my body: my shoulders, my hands, my legs.

After 2 or 3 minutes a thought came to my mind: “Why does it have to be so hard?!!”

Why does it have to be so hard: to raise my children; to have a career; to feel good about myself; to make decisions.

This desperate “Why?” allowed the tears to come finally and flow freely over mCrying with listening partnery cheeks.

I cried for about 10 minutes all the time repeating the sentence. “Why does it have to be so hard?”
Then I stopped crying. I thought I was all finished. But as I was leaving the room to go back to my kids, the phone rang.

It was my Listening Partner, calling me back.

I answer cheerfully and let her know she had just missed the opportunity to hear me cry.

“I’m sorry! I’m here now”, she said in a warm voice.

That was all I needed to burst into tears again. Her listening so warmly and emphatically gave me such a release. I let go of any feelings of shame, holding back or judgments and I just cried.

“You’re doing just fine! You do so much for your family! I’m so sorry it’s hard for you”, my Listening Partner kept repeating. I kept going, crying for another 15 minutes.

When my time was up I felt lighter and more relaxed. I was even able to joke about my state of mind.

It was exactly what I needed!

After that, I was able to go back to my kids and do half an hour each of Special Time with them both,  make dinner and then play some more after that.

I continue to feel amazed at the healing power of Listening Partnerships. I can’t get enough of them. How about you?

 

 

IrinaIrina Nichifiriuc is from Romania and is in the Hand In Hand Instructor Certification Program.

Connect with her on Facebook.

Irina discusses Listening partnerships on her bilingual Romanian-English site.

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