Tag: listening

Reach Out To Your Family Over the Holidays and Feel Better

Laura Minnigerode on Listening Partnerships During the winter holiday season, I often feel overpowered with emotions about the past. While I cherish memories of being with my family, I feel out of touch and alone. We are separated by thousands of miles and communication styles. It’s hard to reach out. The feelings hit hardest on the

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When Our Kids Show Us They “Get It”

By Ravid Aisenman Abrahmsohn I was reminded recently just how much children tell us when we listen – through good times and bad. One family in my Skill Building group has a five- year-old son and a four-month-old daughter. The parents have been practicing the Hand in Hand Tools for 8 months now, and have been

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Help for Homework Tantrums

After the start of the second grade, I very quickly noticed some heavy struggles around homework come up. It was clear I was going to need to help my child with school. At the start of the year, my son’s second grade teacher gave all the parents special instructions for doing homework this year: set

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When Your Child Hurts Another: Working Through Upset

When my daughter was just under two years old, we were playing one day with a friend and her one-year old son. While gently nuzzling the leg of the younger boy, my daughter suddenly took his thigh in her mouth and bit down, HARD. He immediately started screaming and crying. My daughter lurched away, looking

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How I Got My Baby to Give Up the Pacifier and Sleep Better

By the time she was three months old, my entire life was focused on helping my baby daughter get some good sleep. I hired two sleep consultants, read every book on sleep available, but found no answers or magic cures. What I knew I could not do was leave her alone to “cry it out”.

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Silencing Myself Opened My Son Up More Than Ever

My son and I had special time once a week for many years.  He always wanted to do the same thing–go to the mall.  We would play at the arcade, have an ice cream and come home.  It seemed I was always struggling to get him to tell me more about his thoughts and feelings.

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Listening Helps Calm My Grandson’s Fears

When our grandson was one, and just walking, we convinced his parents to let us babysit so they could have a night out.  They were quite nervous because they did not like to hear their son crying.  We told them we could handle it, and promised we would call if things got out of hand.

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Listening Helps When Taking Kids Grocery Shopping

Everything went well until we got to the checkout line and he asked for gum. I said no and he began to have a full blown tantrum, I was completely overwhelmed with the baby, the groceries and him. So I bought the gum. All the way home, I kept saying to myself, “You are being controlled by a child! This can only get worse.”

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Staylistening with a Six-Month-Old Twin

I have a friend who has twin girls. Ever since they were born one of the twins (the second to be born) was labeled the more difficult one. She cried more than her twin sister, she ate less, and was not very easy to please. When they were about six months old, I was visiting the family,

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Jack and the Rude Beanstalk

After a prolonged illness, my 6-year-old was full of feelings and energy. I could tell by the way he was quick to anger, quick to become indignant, and generally by what hard work it was to parent him! I was recovering myself, and hadn’t found many opportunities to be playful. However, last night, I was

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Calm Parenting for Grumpy Mornings

One morning, my 3-year-old said, “I am my brother, not me,” while I was busy getting my older son ready for school.  Ah, a sign of a storm brewing, I thought. I squatted at his level to acknowledge him, but could not stop for more than a short minute. Then, my younger son started complaining,

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Overcoming Stage Fright with Stay Listening

The evening before my 7-year-old daughter had her audition for a community theater production, she asked me, “Why do I have to go to the audition?” I reminded her that she had enjoyed her theater experience the previous year and had wanted to sign up for this year’s show. Her tone instantly became more strident:

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An Olympic Sports Day Staylistening

It was sports day at my children’s new school. My daughter, 8, was in the first of her races and was keen to “get a place,” as she put it – meaning she wanted to come in first, second or third. She ran the race and came in a joint third place, in her mind

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Monkeying Around with Conflict Resolution

This morning, my 2.5 year old son, Lucas, was playing with his monkey. The monkey has a noisemaker inside, and the battery inside the noisemaker was dying, making an unpleasant noise which Lucas didn’t like.  He tried to make it stop with his hands, but he couldn’t. We couldn’t do much about it because the noise

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Overnight with my Daughter and her Best Friend

My daughter asked to bring her girlfriend with us overnight to Sonoma where we planned to spend one night in a hotel with a pool.  Bringing an extra person would change the easy-going relaxation day I had planned, into something different.  There would be scheduling issues to deal with: drop off’s, pick ups, coordinating with

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Facing Water Fears Through Play

My son had been going to swimming lessons for a few months.  His first 2 months he improved markedly each week, trying new things and being comfortable in the water.  He would allow his teachers to guide his head under the water when swimming from one are to another, but would never do it voluntarily

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